You know, I have an idea. I probably ought to tell you something about Central Organizations, the organizations of Scientology around the world. You're probably in total darkness about most of it.

Oh, you don't think you are. Well, I thought I knew something, for instance, about Melbourne, and when I got down there, I found I hadn't known a thing about Melbourne.

No, you're entitled to know. After all, it started in America, and has gone out across the world. You ought to see how far you've gone. Okay?

Male voice: Okay.

Well now, this is particularly important because we're about to make a fundamental shift. A great many people have been working as franchise people; that is to say, franchised auditors, they get regular bulletins, and so forth.

And because of tax structure and other things, this is becoming a very difficult system to maintain. Very easily, the best thing that can be done both for their own activities, their income, for the accuracy of dissemination, and so forth, wherever there's been a successful franchise, there actually ought to be a Central Organization with those people running that franchise in charge of that Central Organization.

This sounds rather odd, but all it means basically: it's taken us years and years and years to find out how to run a Central Organization.

One is built like a watch. It's not possible for this many services to be given by this few people without a pattern like a Central Organization. It's built like a watch. Central Organization has six departments.

They have been shifted here and there and emphasis has been changed. And now, with this new reach and a new emphasis on taking care of the raw public, you might say, a tremendous importance has been handed over to the Personal Efficiency Foundation, which is only one of the departments of a Central Organization.

You write to people in Central Organizations and you wonder why you don't land or connect up quite right or why somebody else answers the letter. The truth of the matter is, if you had a good, sharp idea of what the Central Organization is all about, you would always get your communications promptly and immediately handled.

Educating the public is much harder than educating staff members. This means, however, that in a Central Organization a great deal of know-how exists administratively that exists nowhere else on Earth.

Now, you wouldn't think, perhaps — sometimes you've had ball-ups with Central Organizations and this, that and that. Well, that's nothing compared to the ball-ups you would have if the organization pattern wasn't what it is. You get the idea?

Well, as you begin to expand across the world, you have to have functional servicing organizations which can really do their job and really render the service necessary.

I am not content to let any auditor continue to function unless he is able to clear people. The only way I can guarantee that he clears people is that if his administrative lines are such as to be able to handle his traffic. Otherwise, he won't have a chance clearing people.

This sounds very startling, but administration and the handling of despatches and so forth has been made a discreditable creation by governments. It's an art and skill we had to regain, recapture and pull all together again all over again.

Actually, I'm very proud of what we have done in the last eleven years in this particular respect. And we're now taking a big step forward with Central Organizations right now. Because we're expanding them to take heavy traffic.

It is true that any organization can run all right at a low volume. A field auditor can run all right if he doesn't have too many pcs. That puts a limit on dissemination and recovery the whole day — the whole distance. It runs all right as long as he doesn't have too many customers.

And a badly organized Central Organization is all right unless it gets some business. And let me guarantee you, the moment it gets more traffic than it is designed to handle or more traffic than its accuracy permits it to have, it shatters, and it goes completely to pieces and it ceases to exist.

This happened in 1950. The first organizations of Dianetics were not controlled by myself, except as I could bring some power of personality, rage and red hair against some of the mishmashes which were taking place. But nobody knew how to run one.

We thought it was a business. I don't mean to sneer at businessmen, but I don't know how they live. My attitude toward a businessman when I see this — what he calls a communication system and how he handles his accounts and that sort of thing, is the same attitude that a first or upper-classman has toward a plebe.

He comes in, he looks all through the plebe's room, he does an inspection, you know, and he looks over, and he finally gets under here, and he finds one little tiny particle of dirt, and he says, "Sir, how can you live in such filth?"

Because we can do what we can do, our tricks on the communication lines, the handling of traffic and that sort of thing makes it possible for us to expand just to the degree that we're accurate. Remember, I have seen, I think it was five, Central Organizations — Foundations — shatter under too much traffic. Not too little business; that isn't what knocks them apart. It's too much. Their staff overloads, their communication lines are not adequate, and the next thing you know, they all give up.

The only reason I am alive today is because I can handle my traffic. Berner here was over at Saint Hill. He was quite surprised looking in the files to find out that I'd seen most everything in the files, that I did handle the administrative lines as they came through.

He didn't see how this was possible. Isn't that right, Chuck?

Yeah, I see these student reports and everything else as they come through, but it's only because they come through in a regular fashion, because they come through with accuracy and because they can be stacked up and reviewed when I have time to review them — the lines can be start, changed and stopped — that the flow takes place.

When you write me letters, I see your letters. You don't think so sometimes because you don't see how it's possible. I see your letters. I sometimes, when I read your letter, turn around and say to somebody, "Ack." Or I write "ack" across the corner of the letter. That's because you haven't said anything in the letter that I have to comment on or give you a decision or an opinion on, and usually an acknowledgement simply consists of "Thank you very much for your letter."

So therefore, you say Ron couldn't possibly have seen the letter. No, Ron hasn't got fingers enough to write you a despatch because mail traffic through HCO offices has long since exceeded five thousand pieces of paper a day

We handle a volume that would probably make General Motors pale. We had to redesign Accounts. We found out all the whole subject of accounting was parked back in the nineteenth century. Was parked back with the quill pens and ledgers, and there weren't that many accountants. There aren't that many accountants. Have you tried to get your income tax file recently? You had anything to do with accounting recently? Oh, most of these systems are either put on a superautomatic IBM God-'elp-us…

But anybody can fool an executive with the accounts department. An executive goes down to the accounts department, he says, "How much do we owe Ramseys and Company." Ha-ha. Everybody says, "Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha. We'll send you a report. We'll look it up in the general ledger." All in the tone of "What are you doing down here?" Well, all he's doing is trying to manage the firm; that's all he's doing.

And the accounts departments long since have been run exclusively for the government. No, we have to have an accounts system where a department head or an executive can go down and look up how much Ramseys and Company is owed and makes sure the thing gets paid, gets the total summary of bills, find out everything that's there, add it all up. We've got a complicated accounting system! All it consists of is filing.

If you can file and add and subtract, you can do accounts now in a Central Organization.

There weren't accountants and there weren't a system, so we had to invent accounting. You think I'm kidding, but we did. And it works. The one last Central Organization that doesn't use this type of accounting is still bogged down in accounts.

We just reformed it. It doesn't sound like very much. What's this got to do with Dianetics and Scientology? It's just that the communication design lines of the world were not up to handling Dianetics and Scientology traffic. We run the equivalent of a hospital, a college, a mail service, letter services, we have to keep track of you and what you are and what you're doing, and all of this has to be done with a minimum strain. Otherwise, it totally confuses.

We're in a pattern right now where you probably handle, oh, I don't know, five hundred new people a day in any one Central Organization without expanding its staff more than ten or twelve people.

Sounds fantastic, but I've been working up to a point where as soon as we turned on the — the juice, we wouldn't get a shatter. And I don't intend to let any franchise holder out someplace get the juice turned on and shatter. He'd be running for the next year.

You have no idea what it means. These bodies keep coming in, and they keep demanding things, and if you haven't got places to send them and ways to handle them, and ways to service them, and something to do about it, you get into more beefs, kicks, screams and yowls than you know what to do with.

You just go out through the top of your head and skip the whole thing, that's all.

You get thirty-five, forty bodies lying on top of you, all of them demanding different types of service, if you can't handle them, you're going to — you're going to blow, that's all.

Central Organizations which are badly organized will increase their traffic and then overtly decrease it just to get out from underneath the traffic if their lines are wrong. You realize that?

They cut themselves back. Well, what's this got to do with good dissemination?

Now look, if you're going to handle the mental therapy of Earth, and if you're going to handle the traffic of Earth, if you're going to handle any parts of these civilizations, you're going to have to handle it in some sort of an orderly fashion. Otherwise, you won't be able to handle it. You'll just shatter.

All of its confusions can be pushed in upon you. Basically, the public is there to worry you. Actually, that's the best description of a service facsimile: is that mechanism which is utilized to worry people.

If you wonder what this has got to do, you're not terribly interested in it. But I tell you, you'd get interested if you got in the middle of one of these maelstroms. And remember, I've seen five large organizations shatter just on too much traffic and too little order.

So we're not going to let it happen again. And you'll see us continue to grow and see people perfectly willing to let an organization expand as long as it's expanding properly.

If anybody's going to have anything to do with the Central Organization pattern, the best thing for him to do is take a few weeks off, come into the Central Organization and work as a staff member. Not stand around and observe. Get your hands dirty. Central Organizations are perfectly well equipped to take care of you doing that. You're perfectly welcome to do so. They'll even pay you money.

There's the weirdest things go on. You've got no idea how many motions it takes to handle one membership, and what happens if you don't handle it. You know, you people can scream. You got any idea how high you can scream? Boy, get one "Q" wrong in your name, and you'd think you'd been executed.

But it's much more important that when a person comes in to a Scientology organization to have his case gotten off the launching pad, that this happens now! You understand? Not big excuses: "Well, I'm going to… You came to us a little bit too late." The old psychoanalytic gag.

Psychoanalysts, by the way, lose one-third of their patients in the first three months from suicide. Do you know that? That's an accurate datum. "They came to us too late" is what they tell them.

No, we've got to have this guy, we've got to have this guy away now. Well now, what does it take? If you've got auditors there, what administration does it take to get the pc in their hands, get the thing straightened out, and get the reports proper, and connect everything up with a room in the proper order, and then make awfully sure that the processes get run that the individual paid to have run. Not a bunch of figure-figure or didge or dodge, which will happen too.

You can only then guarantee Scientology works. Then you can guarantee it works. Because it's what's being used. And this is why you've got to have a high level of technical result. When you bring a student in, maybe he's half dead at the end of the course, but he knows how to audit. This you've got to be able to guarantee. You got it?

If you've got the technology to improve somebody, then when they come into a Central Organization, for heaven's sakes, we've got to improve them! That's what we're selling!

Well, it takes a tremendous amount of administration to get that happening. And if it doesn't happen in any kind of volume of traffic, the technical result doesn't occur if the administrative channels don't exist. You'd be amazed.

Well, there's such a thing as a case assessment. We used it ten or eleven years ago. We've revived it recently, and we make the auditor run it. And we make him fill out a full case assessment form. Not on the E-Meter. It's just page after page of "Why did your grandfather have to marry the girl."

And somewhere down the line, we find out why this fellow wants to be audited. And it's usually some reason like he thinks he ought to be a girl, really.

Well, just in the case assessment we find this out, and we can audit in that direction, straighten up, match up a goal and get him off the launching pad because otherwise he's sitting there with a continuous present time problem that he's a man.

And you can dodge all over the place trying to cure this fellow of asthmatics, psychoanalysis, and everything else. We, by the way, have to cure people of psychoanalysis. Takes hours.

I remember the first fellow I ever had who was a psychoanalytic patient, and he kept saying, "Well, I — if I'm very careful, my ulcers don't hurt me anymore because I've had three years of psychoanalysis three hours a week. And if I'm very careful, I don't have ulcers. But if I breathe a little bit wrong, I'm afraid I might, so I don't want you to audit me."

And I says, "All right. I won't audit you. What we'll do is lock-scan you."

And he said, "All right."

So I said, "All right." I said, "Pick up your first appointment with a psychoanalyst, and scan forward to present time through all appointments." He did. Ooooooo! There went his ulcers. They turned right back on again. The only thing that was holding them off was a thin layer of psychoanalysis.

Scanned him three more times, audited the engram necessary to resolve the case, and he didn't have any ulcers anymore. Probably had something else because he was an editor.

Now, we have to cure people of things like that, but if you don't make out long case assessment forms on pcs, you don't learn it.

And this guy is trying to heal his libido by getting the square root of his id. And it has nothing to do with his case. It's something somebody told him. And if you get — don't get the person that told him that this was his goal under heavy duress and get this out of the road, you never audit the pc. Got it?

No, you have to find out things like this. Well, who guarantees that there is a case assessment form, that it is made out, and that somebody looks it over and reanalyzes the case and makes sure that this is the case we are auditing, and this is what we have to do to this case in order to get it off the launching pad? You got it?

Well, it's partially administration, partially technical. Technical fails when the administration fails. And you can handle large numbers of people if your administration is good, but I don't know how the average businessman lives.

Every once in awhile we get a businessman in an organization and he always has a hard time because he thinks we're in business. And we're not in business. We're in service. It has very little to do with business.

We don't ever have any accountants in the organization, for instance. We seldom have any real executives in organizations. We have Scientologists in organizations. We find out they function better.

It's very tough for a non-Scientologist to stay in a Central Organization, let me — let me tell you. It doesn't matter how good he thinks he is. He's being passed on all sides.

Some Scientologist that study — saw — last saw arithmetic in the eighth grade, can usually ac count rings around the average accountant in the Central Organization. We learn these things the hard way.

So, part of a Central Organization means that everybody's case level has got to be in pretty good shape. Otherwise, they'd bog down on all sides. A Central Organization should be Clear.

Therefore, we have to have programs which clear everybody in the Central Organization. Got the idea? We can't let staff auditors go on and knock their brains out forever on pcs without making sure they get audited, so we have to have special auditing programs.

We've got to keep them in there pitching. We make the grade, but the tight, inner core of Scientology is Central Organization personnel. And there's a lot of know-how to be known about it. And that know-how is wide open and free for your study and your use. Go persuade the Association Secretary or something like that to let you work for a while in a Central Organization. Keep your eyes open and you'll see what's going on.

You might be able to get the American Management Association bulletins for the last 250 years, study eighty-nine years under hard duress in all the business colleges on Earth, and you might learn one one-thousandth of what you'd learn in three weeks in a Central Organization. Got it? That's not an exaggeration.

You should see what happens to some businesses when they suddenly hire a Scientologist. For a little while, they don't quite know what's happening. The next thing you know, they have communication systems, and the next thing you know, they're blowing themselves up because the communications are wide open.

They say, "What's going on around here?" You know?

Something horrible happens. All kinds of weird things occur. Scientology gets up against business, why, things happen. Usually, the first thing that happens is the executive starts to resist. He's always been perfectly able to snarl to his secretary. Now he starts snarling down wide-open communication lines, and everybody knows what a dog he is. The only answer to that is get him audited so he doesn't bark.

Oh, here's your basic Central Organization on the United States right where you're sitting right now. Washington, DC. This organization runs about a half a hundred people. They handle a considerable volume of business. They are mainly concerned with broad administration training in the United States. It's quite a watch. Unfortunately, we don't have as many quarters, we don't have as much activity local as we should have. These things are going to be cured very suddenly.

Assoc Sec and I haven't had a chance to talk about it yet, but we will.

And out here in Los Angeles is the West Coast Central Organization, and that organization is about to be cut loose as far as its activity is concerned.

Now, right here in this particular vicinity there are probably two or three Central Organizations could go in. And the immediate plans on Central Organizations, as far as that's concerned, is to put a larger Central Organization in New York. We have a sort of a holding action there right now.

Put a real Central Organization in there, put another one in Chicago, take the Seattle holding organization, groove it in, gun it up, and let it roar. There's probably another one down here in Denver. There's been a holding action consistently down here in Houston, Texas and we'll make something out of that.

We don't mean to take away anybody's front yard or back yard. We're not interested in taking anything away from them. We're interested in giving them something. They make a lot more than they did before and actually have more authority in their area than they'll have.

They'll also have me on the back of their neck if they're not clearing people, which I think they, oddly enough, would happily pay for. Nobody's even going to ask them to pay for it.

This is one country we don't have any Central Organization in. This is a country which has to be helped. It's a country called "Inja." It was invented by Kipling. And ever since it has had to be helped.

And listen, there has been a dicker going on between the London Central Organization and "Inja" now for, I think, about four years, about putting an official Central Organization under the government of India. And they almost connect about twice a year. It's really weird, but they won't help us put in a Central Organization to help them. And every time we turn around, we come a cropper on it.

Now, next to Washington, DC, here is the Commonwealth center of Scientology. It's located here in London. It's down on Fitzroy Street right in West 1, which is the center of London. Now, that organization is actually older than the Washington organization by several years. And it's a mighty fine Central Organization. In their own muck along British way, they do wonderfully. Every time I go over into the Central Organization I say, "What are you people doing now?" You know? After we've exchanged the amenities and been glad to see each other, which is perfectly true, and they say, "Well, we thought Address had better go in the basement, and Training had better go on the roof, and so forth."

And we talk it over, and they've got something, so we compromise and do what I say.

But over here I have to be very careful. I have to pronounce processing, processing, but beyond that I surrender no American accent these days. As a matter of fact, my American accent gets worse in England now instead of less. It's passé for an American to speak with an Oxford accent.

Actually, I haven't had much practice with an Oxford accent. I went to Cambridge myself back about 1840, but the Oxfordian approach is passé. And we have — we have Americanized it to a point where you get better service in England if you say, "Hey, waiter! Gimme a Coke."

He says, "Ah," he says, "an American. I'll have to put ice in the ghloss. I mean, glass."

That's a great crew, though, this London crew. They're great people. The funny part of it is that Scientologists in these Central Organizations get totally interchangeable and totally mixed up. They lose their nationality with great rapidity. The size of the unit is about the only contest that they run between themselves. Their unit pay system and so forth is different than businesses.

And you'll have Melbourne busily arguing with London about "Well, I don't know why you should talk to us. We have had a larger unit than you have for some time." Well, it's about as nationalistic as they get. Or "We've made more Clears than you have." It has nothing to do about we're Australians, and you're Henglish.

But this Central Organization was established early in 1952 when it became quite obvious that we were being shot out of the skies. We didn't really turn the tables in the United States till about 1956, 57, and we flipped the tables hard by that time. But in those days, we were just being shot out of the saddle every time we tried to mount — cut to ribbons.

If it wasn't Internal Revenue, it was the American Medical or somebody else. We were having a rough time.

So I started this enfilade fire proposition. I went over to London and started a Central Organization so as to discourage anybody shooting at the American organizations. They found out there wasn't much use shooting at the American organizations. Everything would come in from London. There was no sense in shooting at the London organization. Everything would come in from America. It drove them into apathy. It actually worked. So there is the center of control of the Commonwealth. And all Scientology in the Commonwealth is really controlled from London. That's because it has good, old-fashioned communication lines that still work.

Now, down here below London, almost on the map… Let's see if it's on this globe. Yes, by George, Saint Hill. London — yeah, that's right, Saint Hill, what do you know. They — it's not there.

It's a very beautiful, old English estate, the one-time luxury estate of the Maharajah of Jaipur. And it has enormous grounds. I suppose you probably couldn't landscape a place in the United States for a million dollars that would look like Saint Hill.

It's a gorgeous old manor house. It's very roomy, very modern. The — just before the Maharajah, the wife of the American Ambassador Biddle had the place, and she installed eight or ten bathrooms complete, and installed good central heating, so it had already been Americanized when we acquired it.

You can always tell when an American has taken over an English castle. It has bathrooms and central heating. The two things that are the badges of this civilization.

The — but — that is totally HCO, which we just got the badge for. That is the center of HCO. And HCO has an office in every Central Organization and has a lot of other offices besides, and they require their own center and that's why we have Saint Hill.

It's about thirty-two miles from London in the quiet, quiet countryside, and it's pretty gorgeous — private fishing lakes and all that sort of thing. But it tries not to get too much involved in the London organization. But most of these offices now are connected by telex or teletypewriter, so that you put a message into a typewriter at one end, and it comes out in the actual HCO office at the other end. It's the only way we can control this much area.

Now, here in Paris, Scientology has been learning to speak French for a number of years and has got an interesting foothold. It's a tiny organization run by an American who is very French and a very swell fellow. And he's coming on up these days. He's doing all right, and we're real happy with him.

Now, in the down-under category, the next large Central Organization that occurred was down here, down here in Melbourne. Melbourne, Australia. And it's a nice, big Central Organization.

This Central Organization is immediately across the street from Parliament House. And it has two large buildings which go very deep, and the staff, every time it passes in and out and isn't thinking about something else, looks longingly over at Parliament House and wonders when it is going to occupy that house. You think I'm just joking, but the Australian staff fully intends to take over that Parliament House.

It's no longer the Parliament of Australia since that's moved to Canberra, so they don't see any reason why anybody else should have it, and they don't see anybody — reason anybody else should govern Australia. They're cocky.

But these are terrific people. These are terrific people here. This is — it's one of the older Central Organizations, a terrific crew. They have, oh, I don't know, half a hundred or so. It's just fabulous. They are a great team.

And they have now opened up another Central Organization in Sydney, and another Central Organization over here in Perth. And all of those are booming.

This country and South Africa have a war between them. And their war is totally which one is going to become the first Scientology country on Earth. And they actually have a big contest going that they've originated all by themselves.

Here's the next big Central Organization. It's a rather new one. There have been numerous HASIs down here, but no real big one. And here we have Johannesburg, South Africa. And in Johannesburg, right in… There's Joburg. And Johannesburg has three buildings and a tremendous — a lot of activity, and is now the busiest Central Organization on Earth.

Suzie and I have been down there, and I have been kicking it forward, taking in thirty brand-new people a day off the street and servicing them with processing and training. And it's quite a… It doesn't sound like many at first glance, but brother, that sure clutters up your halls. And that organization would have blown apart about six times if we hadn't held it together with sticky plaster and glue.

Now, in addition to that, we have down here at Durban another Central Organization, which is the Central Organization of Natal. Right here at Durban, that's under Peter. He's doing fine, and he's making a good show of it. As a matter of fact, the other day he put in a twenty-four-foot vertical sign that is white with red letters which says Scientology — in order to light up the neighborhood, he told the town council, so they let him put it in.

Now, Jack and Allison have just gone down here to Cape Town to open up another Central Organization in Cape Town. That'll be booming along very shortly.

Now, when you look at this planet here, you are very struck by the fact that here in Berlin we have a contact office, and in London we have an office, and in Paris we have an office. And now, look-a-here. Now look, that's totally dark all the way. The whole Soviet Socialist God-'elp-us Republic, and every one of its slave countries. And there isn't a single Central Organization or HCO office anywhere in that area.

Well, I'm not quite sure what we're going to do about it, but we're going to do something. I'm not kidding, because in there is over half the population of Earth blocked out totally.

Now, speaking of contact offices, however, we have one down here in San Juan, Puerto Rico, and we have another one down here in Brazil.

We've had organizations in Hawaii, and we're going to straighten that out soon, now that it's a state.

When you look this over, we cover an awful lot of this globe, but there's a great missing portion of that globe right there I don't like to have missing. Because it doesn't seem to me like it belongs to other people. We might as well own it. Well, somebody ought to own it. The communists can't own anything. Maybe if we just kept saying we are the real owners of Russia, maybe they'd give it to us, you know?

We also have offices in some of the other African states, contacts and that sort of thing, but it's quite remarkable how long these communication lines are and how accurately they function and how quickly they work.

Now, there are several empires of the past that we could inherit. We could inherit the Roman Empire, the British Empire, the various empires. These things are not being hung together very well these days. Their communication lines are still there, and to some degree we use these communication lines, which is quite interesting.

But I'm quite, actually, quite proud of what Scientologists have done over the years, very proud.

Most of these fellows have just gone out into the middle of nowhere, you know, and sat down and started things up, and then pretty soon said, "Hey, Ron, give me a hand," and I've tried to do what I could for them.

A lot of people have been through Central Organizations, gone out into private practice, eddy around one way or the other. There's a whole crew down in Tucson has an HCO office down there, and so on. I imagine one of these days it'll cohese into an actual Central Organization down there in Tucson. That's what they intended to do the last time I was talking to them.

But my effort is not to make these people a ruled people. My effort is quite the opposite. I wish these people to be as autonomous as possible. And some Assoc Sec starts screaming at me too hard for too much help, I begin to look at him and find out what's happened to his determinism.

An effort to make all these people function as they'll function and stand on their own two feet and so forth is probably a very strange effort on this Earth, but it's nevertheless being very thoroughly made.

The Scientology population of Earth is at this moment beyond calculation. I couldn't even give you a guess what it is. In the first place, many field auditors hold out on us the exact count of their groups, so we can never tell you how many there are. But it is quite large. And I saw something the other day — somebody said that there were 350 auditors in one country. And I thought, "Where the devil did he get his figures?" Ha-ha, we trained that many in that country in a matter of eighteen months. What happened to them? This is kind of goofy, the figures that we have on this. We don't know what the Scientology population of Earth is. It is heavy. We don't know how many practitioners there are on Earth. They are considerable.

Every once in a while we hear from somebody new that is operating some place or another. Some guy just read a book and joined us, and we didn't even know about him.

Well, I'm awfully proud of these people, the way they stick to it, and so forth. They form a tremendous lot of awfully good people. Probably, undoubtedly the freest people on Earth. We probably are the free people of Earth.

But whenever I think about these guys and how hard they work and how much they give up for all this, why, I feel mighty proud of them — mighty proud.

The Scientologists of the world consider themselves Scientologists and less and less Americans, Australians, Rhodesians, and so forth. We may not only be a free people, we may be the new people of Earth.

Certainly we part company rather rapidly with the humanoid band. And something new is happening which we ourselves don't have too much control of. Something is occurring.

Some people complain and say we have too many new words. Well, we have new words for the number of unknowns there were because there weren't any words for them. So it's inevitable. If they say we have too many words, say, "Well, that shows you how many new things we've discovered."

When I think of these people, though, across the face of Earth, all of them dedicated, doing their jobs as best they know how, making a tremendous inroad here and there, well, I see there's some definite hope for this planet.

And I myself feel tremendously repaid for the amount of work which I have put in on this, because my work on this in the last thirty years has not been slight. During the last ten years it's been full of hard, rough spots and heartbreaks. It's been a rough road, but the toll is well paid by the people that work in this subject. Because I'm very, very proud of them. Let's give them a hand, huh?

Now, you wonder maybe why I've taken all this time to tell you something about these branch offices. I wanted to show them to you on this globe. I wanted to give you some idea of what they were. These are not businesses. These are not organizations. It's a misnomer. This is a new movement on the face of Earth and I just wanted to show you that it's circling this globe. And it is going faster and faster, and more and more effectively, and particularly now when we can do what we're going to do, which is we're going to run testing and types of courses and units and — of activity that the planet's never seen before. We'll win along this line.

Now, before, I was fighting rather defensively, I was trying to keep our skirts clean in order to get the research done and not get stopped in mid-track.

Well, from here on, they better watch out, because I'm not going to put on any brakes. There's no point in doing so. I can get involved in as many fights as can be started.

The point is, the point is that we have made our technical goals, and that is very important. I'm very happy that we have made our technical goals because I… If anybody had told me that you could wrap this whole thing up in thirty-one years, I would have said, "Oh, no. Obviously, a dozen, dozen lifetimes. Get all the common denominators and fundamentals of the human mind and life and livingness and growth and basics and so on, and the history of man and where he's been and what he's done, and how you cure him and handle him and straighten it all out. And then how you administrate it and how you disseminate it, and so forth. Thirty years? Who's crazy, man? Nobody could do that! Couldn't be done. It's impossible."

So we've done it — a third of a century. And for more than a decade, I've had lots of help, and I'm real proud of that help. And I want to thank you very much.

I want to thank you particularly for coming to this congress. It's a good show. It made it worthwhile. You know, I'm flying twenty thousand miles just to give you this congress.

I return — I'm going on back down to Joburg as soon as I give the first week's orientation to this ACC. What I'm confronting at once is finishing up the — what we call the hats of the Central Organization in Joburg so that patterns of Central Organizations can be repatterned elsewhere on this present expansion.

I'm also confronting another very interesting project when I get back there. I haven't taken it up fully with one and all, but I'll let you in on it.

We're taking over, as much as we can, the juvenile delinquency, white juvenile delinquency program of South Africa. We can handle this breed of cat, and we're the only ones on Earth who can, and it's a good place to take off.

Now, we've got very good connections in this and we can undoubtedly pull it off. We have the technology necessary to resolve the case. We haven't got to worry about that. The basic thing we've got to do is — not even settle the administrative pattern of how we handle it — what I've got to do is find a piece of land which is very close to one of the large prison farms down there in order to take over the fellows, the juveniles, when they come in there, and take them over and process them. And it's mostly a problem of where do I — I've got to find the quarters. That's a big problem in view of the fact that every fifth real estate man in South Africa now is a Scientologist.

The one thing that is heartening about South Africa is you — they booted the communists out a few years ago. They really booted them out on their ear. They closed the Russian Embassy and everything else. They just threw them out bodily.

Maybe this was a very violent action, but it is a funny thing that the atmosphere is rather easy to work in. If you want to know how much resistance there is to any social activity and so forth, you ought to just suddenly start moving in an area that doesn't have that resistance. And it feels all of a sudden like you've been — lost your weight, you know. You've gone antigravity or something. It's kind of interesting.

There's a tremendous amount — or has been here in the past — internal pressure inside the United States. And it's very odd that we go so easily forward in a country that doesn't have that same internal pressure, which is the communist pressure.

The only reason we fight communism is because they get in our roads. It's like you fight flies, you know? And it's very easy to operate down in South Africa. That's because you seldom run into it.

You run into it on the newspapers once in a while. You run into a newspaper reporter who's sitting there waving his little hammer and sickle. But press is very free down there. The newspaper, however, gives the outsider, who is there temporarily, an odd opinion of the country, but what he should do is look at the idea that it's a police state, you know, and then realize what's being printed in the newspapers. It's kind of odd, you know. No police state permits that sort of thing to be published in the newspapers. There's no censorship.

There was a short censorship during the emergency. You couldn't advocate revolt or something. But the operating climate is very easy. But that's not why I'm there.

Why I'm there, basically, is I need — much more important than an escape from an H-bomb, which I think we'll tape anyhow one of these days shortly. A couple of the guys just tell me the other night they were working on it. The fact is that we need a training area. That's what I'm trying to provide.

Well, look. Let's take this one. I set up a juvenile delinquency program, and we're running through juvenile delinquents like mad, you see — more and more juvenile delinquents and straighten them all out and making them good citizens, and sending them out the other end, and so on. We can get them paroled if we straighten them out, see? And that's very easy, and we're running through this, and we're taking care of this social program and that social program, and of course we'll accumulate quarters, and we'll accumulate training areas.

And somebody who wants to handle a juvenile delinquency program for Detroit can do no better than to come down to South Africa and spend some time on that juvenile delinquency program line. Find out how it works and what it looks like.

You see why we want it. Why we need it. We need a basic training area.

One of the reasons I don't want you to be frightened about South Africa is some of you are going to come down there in the near future. There's nothing to be frightened about except what they say about it. And look who's there. The marines have long since landed and have the situation well in hand.

But we need some place where we can do experimental runs and do training. Training is an expensive sort of thing unless you have subsistence and that sort of thing. And I imagine somebody who was really being genned in on how to handle juvenile delinquents and juvenile delinquency program — the best thing to do would be to pick the best man for it on a trainee basis for some area and then let him stay down there for six, eight, ten months or a year; and it wouldn't cost him any money, don't you see? He'd really learn the program and be able to go and put the program in someplace else.

Unless we pick up a juvenile delinquency program around the world, man's going to lose anyhow. I don't say all juveniles are delinquents, but they sure have a lot of opportunity these days.

But we have — we have big plans, we have a big future. I'm not pushing on it too hard because I don't have to push now.

I was very glad to be able to come up here and be able to give you this congress and talk to you. If I've offended you in any way in befriending the South African government or if you think I've talked against the Bantu, you ought to talk to some of the Bantu and find out how they think about me. They think I'm pretty good.

The point I'm making here is I hope I haven't stepped on your toes. I have carefully, during this whole congress, not discussed the subject of Christianity. So say "thank you."

Audience: Thank you.

We have — well, I've tried to give you a lot of news. I haven't given you very much technical data. And in the last three minutes of play, I'm going to give you a few case tips, and send you home happy. Of course, I'll meet you at the party tonight, but that's beside the point.

The first thing I want to call to your attention… Yeah, I fooled somebody. I brought some notes. Solid.

These are all HCO Bulletins. A lot of them are in circulation, but I wanted to call to your attention HCO Bulletin of December 15, 1960, Pre-Session 37.

The auditor runs "What question shouldn't I ask you?" for a few times.

And then he runs "Think of something you've done." "Think of something you have withheld." Alternated for a short time (maximum five minutes).

Then he runs "What question shouldn't I ask you?" a few more times.

I want to illuminate that to you because I want some of you auditors that are fooling around with cases and getting them skidding, I want you to get off the launching pad and stop monkeying.

You can't get any case gains that are stable and will continue while your pc has withholds he is not willing to tell you. And if you ask a pc if there is any question in the world that you ask him that would embarrass him and get a tremble on an E-Meter needle with sensitivity at 16, he is not in condition to be audited. Do you hear me?

Male voice: Yep.

Not a single soul is going to get a permanent case gain while he is sitting on a heavy withhold. I'm sorry, those of you who are sitting on heavy withholds, you're going to have to give them up.

Now, the only thing that — this is about the only thing that is holding up cases, and the only thing that is upsetting auditors. Auditors just don't want to reach that hard and inquire that privately into a pc.

Now, that's basically the only thing that's holding things up, and I want you to quit it!

There isn't any point in trying to get audited and get Clear while you're sitting there on a big social withhold that you don't dare tell the auditor. Why not condemn yourself to eternity and skip it?

Well, that's the alternate. It's that important to hand them out.

Now listen, auditors. Sensitivity 16, any variation of the question: "What question shouldn't I ask you," "Is there anything that if I asked you it would embarrass you?" That's an alteration of the question. "Is there something you don't want to tell me?" "Is there something you hope your mother won't find out?" "Is there something that the police would arrest you for if they walked in the room at this moment?"

I don't care how you phrase this "What question shouldn't I ask you." If any variation of it gets a response on the needle with sensitivity at 16, any quiver, that pc isn't in state to be audited. And you stop monkeying, will you? Because that's the only thing that slows them down. That's the only part of the buttons on the launching pad that aren't being hit heavy enough by auditors the world around. They don't want to invade privacy that deeply.

Now, there's some people in the audience that intended to get audited a few minutes ago that, before I made this remark, may have now decided — they may have now decided that they shouldn't be audited.

I'm reminded of this dear, dear, mystical mystic I was telling you about. We straightened her out. She was about seventy, she was dear and sweet with a bobbing flower on her hat. Dear, sweet lady, and had never gotten anyplace in auditing. "What question shouldn't I ask you?" And she'd think for a while, and the needle on the E-Meter would go fmmp. And then she'd say, "Well, you shouldn't ask me the definition of a thetan."

And pretty soon the auditor got very clever, after consultation with Mary Sue, and every time the needle went thoom, didn't wait for the pc to come out of it but said, "What was that? What was that right there? What did you just think of?"

She gave it up. This dear, sweet, old lady had had fifty separate affairs. And hadn't ever mentioned one of them to her husband. She'd been busy! And the second we got those off the run, she gave up all of her mystical mysticism, she straightened out, her neuroses went away, her nightmares went away, she looked about twenty-five years younger, and all of a sudden at the end of another forty or fifty hours, says, "You know, I'll have to take an HPA course now. All of the data about mysticism has blown away, and I need something to fill it up, so I'm…"

So, reach harder and pull smarter, and you'll get more rolls and more stability on the line. That isn't all there is to auditing. I'll tell you the rest of it in the 22nd American or in the HCA Course.

I want to thank you very much for coming to this congress. Every time I see you, you look better, you look younger, you look smarter.

I may not see you for a long time. Until I do again, why, take care of the country for me, will you?

Audience: Yes.

Thanks a lot for coming to this congress. Happy New Year, and God bless you.

Thank you.